Sunday, January 22, 2012

Lying to Ourselves

Lying to ourselves is more deeply ingrained than lying to others - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves. - Eric Hoffer

It's rarely intentional.  Heck, most of the time we don't even realize we are doing it.  And it's an easy thing to get caught up in because there really is no concrete evidence that we are even doing it.  We try to convince ourselves that we aren't depressed so that we won't upset others or because we think it will just go away.  We say to ourselves that we haven't put on weight when the waistband of our jeans is cutting into our muffin top.  We fool ourselves into believing that the extra slice of pizza won't "hurt us" because we will "work it off tomorrow".  Sometimes, tomorrow doesn't come and the only person that gets hurt by the lies is US. 

Deceiving ourselves is easy to do.  We hope that our reality will change and that our self-deception will be inconsequential.  We have no one to be accountable to but ourselves and since we are already lying to ourselves, another little white lie won't make a difference, right?  WRONG.  Most of us try to be honest and not lie to those we love so why do we treat ourselves differently?  I know that I have done it and, as much as I try not to, still do.  But I'm doing better (and that's no lie).

One of the most important things in breaking the habit is to have a few people in your life that will be honest with you - even when it's hard or ugly.  A great support system is crucial and if you have that in your life, use it!  The next step is to have a sit-down with yourself.  Ask yourself why you feel it's okay to lie to yourself.  For me, staring at myself in a mirror and having a heart-to-heart was a major step in the right direction.  Although I did this months ago, I still periodically have the "come to Jesus" talk with myself to keep me in line.  I realized that I owe myself the same honesty and truth that I give to others.  I'm just as worthy of those things as are the other people that I love because, I love myself too.  

Weight loss and wellness are certainly about what we take in from a nutritional standpoint but it's also about what we take into ourselves spiritually.  We must take care of ourselves physically and mentally to make it all work.  We all fall off the wagon and that's okay as long as we don't fool ourselves into thinking that we didn't or that it wasn't a big deal.  Be honest with yourself but don't beat yourself down.  There is a difference.  Tough love is acceptable but don't chastise yourself because doing so causes the cycle to remain.  If you know you are going to be "mean" to yourself because you ate three cookies instead of one, will that make you want to come clean about what you did?  Probably not.  

Treat yourself with love,patience and respect.  You will be amazed at how well you will do on your path to wellness.  

Happy Trails!

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